I think it’s a tradition in my family to completely implode on turkey day, so I’m sharing that tradition and will live blog.
1pm: got off work early. This means I may get to get everything done. I still have to shop. Expecting to actually be on time and get things done early this year. Heading to Chuck’s dad’s house for thanksgiving because they are awesome people and their family gathering is always fun.
1:12pm: broke a nail. Must now take a detour to get it repaired, since acrylics are sharp when broken.
3:12pm: finished doctor appointment early. Have fetched The Son from his early dismissal from school. Am running ahead of schedule.
4:08pm: have completed all shopping in record time. This is a thanksgiving miracle.
4:22: getting nail repaired. Am now realizing that I neglected to purchase one key ingredient for one key meal component. Even though I had a list and checked it four times, and said ingredient was on the list. There is no substitute for peanuts in a peanut butter pie. Must now go back to store at rush hour to obtain. God help us.
4:43: have eaten dinner early. Must now brave the store. Pray for me.
5:32: I am lucky the store was not as crowded as originally anticipated. And that it is conveniently located three minutes from my house. If I have to go back, will have to walk. Parking lot is atrocious.
5:42: arrive at home. Head to kitchen to start dough for rolls. Realize belatedly that yeast expired in February. For real.
5:55: yeast seems to be doing yeasty things as anticipated. Set rolls to rise.
6:15: finish crust for peanut butter pie and put in oven for 10 minutes. I am already over doing this and need a nap. Sit down to stare at wall for 5 minutes.
6:43: stop staring at wall. Peanut butter pie crust has burned, as I neglected to set a timer. Start crust over and obsessively check it for the next 10 minutes.
6:59: crust looks nothing like photo accompanying recipe. Have decided looks are not everything. Chocolate coats most surfaces in my kitchen, as I am no good with chocolate-related baking.
7:01: regret giving up drinking.
7:15: I am ready for bed. The pie crust for the pumpkin pie is done and wrapped and put in the fridge.
8:12pm: I am in bed. I will probably wake up early tomorrow, even though I do not have an alarm set.
5:15am: my alarm goes off. Because it’s Thursday, and my iPhone isn’t quite smart enough to read my mind and know I don’t work today. Attempt to roll over and go back to sleep.
5:24: I apparently hit the snooze button. Am now wide awake. Realizing I did not buy peanut butter. For peanut butter pie. Am starting to hate all things peanut-related.
5:42: after finding peanut butter in the back of a cupboard (not expired!), realize I forgot about the rising dough for rolls. Discover dough has not escaped bowl, but is quite close. Thank God. Praying this is the last of the craziness.
6:12am: have finished peanut butter pie. Contemplate eating entire thing while sitting on the floor in my kitchen. Decide against. Place in fridge to cool.
6:42: start Disney music. Maybe that will turn my mood/karma around.
6:55: doing entire song and dance number to Poor Unfortunate Souls in my kitchen. Look out kitchen window during the high note to see neighbor standing on his front porch, laughing hysterically. Wave and smile and pretend like I did it on purpose. Preheat oven for pie crust.
7:15: trying to microwave butter. Microwave makes popping sound and dies. Oh dear.
7:16: realize the oven has died. And the fridge. I’ve blown a fuse, and of course, I have glass fuses. This is an old house. And I’ve used the last one two days ago, and there’s only one store in town that sells them. And they are not open on thanksgiving.
7:17: have decided I will not need to use the dryer today. Pulled that fuse and replaced the blown fridge/oven fuse with that. Oven and fridge both back on. Proceeding accordingly.
8:47am: took a break. Rolls are rising in the hot box I’ve created in my bedroom. The gorgeous crust I made for the pumpkin pie shrunk in the oven and now looks like someone ate the edges.
9:03: thank god for my friend Pauli. I could have sworn that the Macy’s parade started at 10, but she knows how I roll and made sure to remind me.
9:04: um….I ran out of tin foil. Send help.
9:07: am trying like crazy to avoid going to the store today. I really really don’t want to be That Girl who goes to the store on thanksgiving. Have jury-rigged a crust shield, since the edges of the pie have shrunken and started to burn.
9:27am: peanut butter pie, check. Pumpkin pie is ready to bake. One dozen rolls done. I have managed to turn it around today, which is also a Cupcake Family Tradition. This is earlier than normal though.
This is called foreshadowing I think.
11:50: just woke up from an unplanned nap. Surprisingly, I am still ahead of schedule. Pumpkin meringue pie is done, except for meringue, which has to be done at 2:30. Have 5 dozen rolls done, still think it’s not enough.
It’s a thanksgiving miracle.
1:03pm: I have obtained bliss. The rolls are done, all but the meringue for the pumpkin pie is done and I am now sprawled out on the couch before showering and heading over to the ex’s house in 2 hours. So I’m pretty much done. I have some backup rolls to bake, but otherwise….we are ready for launch.